The Church worked hard at it night and day during nine centuries and imprisoned, tortured, hanged, and burned whole hordes and armies of witches, and washed the Christian world clean with their foul blood. Then it was discovered that there was no such thing as witches, and never had been. One doesn't know whether to laugh or to cry. Who discovered that there was no such thing as a witch - the priest, the parson? No, these never discover anything.

Happiness ain't a thing in itself - it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant.

Love your enemy, it will scare the hell out of them.

Truth is stranger than fiction-to some people, but I am measurably familiar with it.

Some things you can't find out; but you will never know you can't by guessing and supposing: no, you have to be patient and go on experimenting until you find out that you can't find out.

I can understand German as well as the maniac that invented it, but I talk it best through an interpreter.

It is a worthy thing to fight for one's freedom; it is another sight finer to fight for another man's.