The Church worked hard at it night and day during nine centuries and imprisoned, tortured, hanged, and burned whole hordes and armies of witches, and washed the Christian world clean with their foul blood. Then it was discovered that there was no such thing as witches, and never had been. One doesn't know whether to laugh or to cry. Who discovered that there was no such thing as a witch - the priest, the parson? No, these never discover anything.

Information appears to stew out of me naturally, like the precious otter of roses out of the otter.

I found out that I was a Christian for revenue only and I could not bear the thought of that, it was so ignoble.

God rewards gamblers and fools. The crucial thing, when you win, is knowing which you were.

Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get.

The man who is ostentatious of his modesty is twin to the statue that wears a fig-leaf.

You may call a jay a bird. Well, so he is, in a measure--because he's got feathers on him, and don't belong to no church, perhaps;but otherwise he is just as much a human as you be. And I'll tell you for why. A jay's gifts and instincts, and feelings, and interests, cover the whole ground. A jay hasn't got any more principle than a Congressman.