In God We Trust. It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased; it always sounds well - In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.
Mark TwainShall we go on conferring our Civilization upon the peoples that sit in darkness, or shall we give those poor things a rest?
Mark TwainThere are three infallible ways of pleasing an author, and the three form a rising scale of compliment: 1, to tell him you have read one of his books; 2, to tell him you have read all of his books; 3, to ask him to let you read the manuscript of his forthcoming book. No. 1 admits you to his respect; No. 2 admits you to his admiration; No. 3 carries you clear into his heart.
Mark TwainIn the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians to correct that.
Mark TwainBeing made merely in the image of God but not otherwise resembling him enough to be mistaken by anybody but a very near sighted person.
Mark TwainAll schools, all colleges, have two great functions: to confer, and to conceal, valuable knowledge. The theological knowledge which they conceal cannot justly be regarded as less valuable than that which they reveal. That is, when a man is buying a basket of strawberries it can profit him to know that the bottom half of it is rotten.
Mark Twain