The Christian Bible is a drug store. It´s contents have remained the same but the medical practice continues. For 1,800 years these changes were slight--scarcely noticeable... The dull and ignorant physician day and night, and all the days and all the nights, drenched his patient with vast and hideous doses of the most repulsive drugs to be found in the store´s stock. He kept him religion sick for eighteen centuries, and allowed him not a well day during all that time.

The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms.

The proverb says that Providence protects children and idiots. This is really true. I know because I have tested it.

Man is the only animal that is cruel. It kills just for the sake of it.

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

The timid man yearns for full value and demands a tenth. The bold man strikes for double value and compromises on par.

Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail. What you gain at one end you lose at the other. It's like feeding a dog on his own tail. It won't fatten the dog.