Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.

I had longed to be a butterfly, and I was one at last. I attended private parties in sumptuous evening dress, simpered and aired my graces like a born beau, and polkaed and schoisched with a step peculiar to myself - and the kangaroo.

My advice to girls: first, don't smoke - to excess; second, don't drink - to excess; third, don't marry - to excess.

Public Servant: Persons chosen by the people to distribute the graft.

I have thought many times since that if poets when they get discouraged would blow their brains out, they could write very much better when they got well.

I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.

When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet in his private heart no man much respects himself.