Honesty: The best of all the lost arts.

It is a good idea to obey all the rules when you're young just so you'll have the strength to break them when you're old.

Prosperity is the surest breeder of insolence I know.

Some people give their problems swimming lessons instead of drowning them.

The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms.

Humor must be one of the chief attributes of God. Plants and animals that are distinctly humorous in form and characteristics are God's jokes.

Tea is an affront to lunch and an insult to dinner.