Your friends may love you in private but your enemies will hate you in public.

When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them--then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are far apart.

It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human race.

Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper.

Every improvement that is put upon the real estate is the result of an idea in somebody's head. The skyscraper is another idea; the railroad is another; the telephone and all those things are merely symbols which represent ideas. An andiron, a wash-tub, is the result of an idea that did not exist before.