We must look for our own blame to find our own personality.

Crowds stand around all day long and criticise that bridge, and find fault with it, and tell with unlimited frankness how it ought to have been planned, and how they would have built it had the city granted them the $14,000 it cost. It is really refreshing to hang around these and listen to them. A foreigner would come to the conclusion that all America was composed of inspired professional bridge builders.

Humor is tragedy plus time.

Man is without doubt the most interesting fool there is. He concedes that God made the angels immune from pain and death, and that he could have been similarly kind to man, but denies that he was under any moral obligation to do so.

Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.

All saints can do miracles, but few of them can keep a hotel.

Supposing is good, but finding out is better.