By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.

We are all ignorant; just about different things.

Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough.

Humor is tragedy plus time.

Well, my book is written-let it go. But if it were only to write over again there wouldn't be so many things left out. They burn in me; and they keep multiplying; but now they can't ever be said. And besides, they would require a library-and a pen warmed up in hell.

Protestant parents still keep a Bible handy in the house, so that the children can study it, and one of the first things the little boys and girls learn is to be righteous and holy and not piss against the wall. They study those passages more than they study any others, except those which incite to masturbation. Those they hunt out and study in private.

A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditch digging.