What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.

I think we never become really and genuinely our entire and honest selves until we are dead--and not then until we have been dead years and years. People ought to start dead, and they would be honest so much earlier.

Temperate temperance is best; intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance.

There is no such thing as the Queen's English. The property has gone into the hands of a joint stock company and we own the bulk of the shares!

Between believing a thing and thinking you KNOW is only a small step and quickly taken.

Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in its use.

Don't you know that the very thing a man dreads is the thing that always happens?