Seasickness: at first you are so sick you are afraid you will die, and then you are so sick you are afraid you won't die.

Quitting smoking is easy, I've done it hundreds of times.

Our heroes are men who do things which we recognize, with regret, and sometimes with a secret shame, that we cannot do.

I have not professionally dealt in truth. Many when they come to die have spent all the truth that was in them, and enter the next world as paupers. I have saved up enough to make an astonishment there.

Nothing is so ignorant as a man's left hand, except a lady's watch.

At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass

Never run after you own hat - others will be delighted to do it; why spoil their fun?