Epitaphs are cheap, and they do a poor chap a world of good after he is dead, especially if he had hard luck while he was alive. I wish they were used more.

I can always tell which is the front end of a horse, but beyond that, my art is not above the ordinary.

Manifestly, dying is nothing to a really great and brave man.

A historian who would convey the truth has got to lie. Often he must enlarge the truth by diameters, otherwise his reader would not be able to see it.

To be, or not to be; that is the bare bodkin That makes calamity of so long life.

Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

We despise all reverences and all objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us.