Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink and swore his last oath. Today, we are a pious and exemplary community. Thirty days from now, we shall have cast our reformation to the winds and gone to cutting our ancient shortcomings considerably shorter than ever.

Make your mark in New York and you are a made man.

You can't no more teach what you ain't learned than you can come from where you ain't been.

These are the true and only God, mighty and supreme.

The pulpit and the optimist are always talking about the human race's steady march toward ultimate perfection. As usual, they leave out the statistics. It is the pulpit's way - the optimist's way.

What work I have done I have done because it has been play. If it had been work I shouldn't have done it.

Never let formal education get in the way of your learning.