The ordinary chestnut can beget a sickly and reluctant laugh, but it takes a horse chestnut to fetch the gorgeous big horse-laugh.

We consider that any man who can fiddle all through one of those Virginia Reels without losing his grip may be depended upon in any kind of musical emergency.

Kings cannot ennoble thee, thou good, great soul, for One who is higher than kings hath done that for thee; but a king can confirm thy nobility to men.

A gentleman is a man who can play the banjo, but doesn't.

Fleas can be taught nearly anything a congressman can.

A conspiracy is nothing but a secret agreement of a number of men for the pursuance of policies which they dare not admit in public

Always do what's right. That will gratify some and surprise the rest.