The pulpit and the optimist are always talking about the human race's steady march toward ultimate perfection. As usual, they leave out the statistics. It is the pulpit's way - the optimist's way.

[The Bible is] a mass of fables and traditions, mere mythology.

Happiness ain't a thing in itself - it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant.

Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.

You need not expect to get your book right the first time.

None of us can be as great as God, but any of us can be as good.

A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape.