Irrevence is another person's disrespect to your god; there isn't any word that tells what your disrespect to his god is.

If you're looking for friends when you need them...it's too late.

You can't no more teach what you ain't learned than you can come from where you ain't been.

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Sometimes I lifted a chicken that warn't roosting comfortable, and took him along. Pap always said, take a chicken when you get achance, because if you don't want him yourself you can easy find somebody that does, and a good deed ain't ever forgot. I never see papa when he didn't want the chicken himself, but that is what he used to say, anyway.

People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either being made.

If a person offends you, and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures; simply watch your chance, and hit him with a brick.