If you are with the quality, or at a funeral, or trying to go to sleep when you ain't sleepy - if you are anywheres where it won't do for you to scratch, why you will itch all over in upwards of a thousand places.

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation.

To go abroad has something of the same sense that death brings. I am no longer of ye-what ye say of me is now of no consequence.

The thing for us to do is just to do our duty, and not worry about whether anybody sees us do it or not.

The best of us would rather be popular than right.

The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.

All saints can do miracles, but few of them can keep a hotel.