Give a man a reputation as an early riser and he can sleep 'til noon.

I would rather go to bed with Lillian Russell stark naked than Ulysses S Grant in full military regalia.

Drop this mean and sordid and selfish devotion to the saving of your shabby little souls, and hunt up something to do that's got some dignity to it! Risk your souls! Risk them in good causes; then if you lose them, why should you care? Reform!

If you have nothing to say, say nothing.

The ordinary chestnut can beget a sickly and reluctant laugh, but it takes a horse chestnut to fetch the gorgeous big horse-laugh.

The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

The Indian may seem poor to we rich Westerners but in matters of the spirit it is we who are the paupers and they who are millionaires.