We are discreet sheep; we wait to see how the drove is going, and then go with the drove.

No God and no religion can survive ridicule. No political church, no nobility, no royalty or other fraud, can face ridicule in a fair field, and live.

I like a thin book because it will Steady a Table, a leather volume because it will Strop a Razor, and a heavy book because it can be Thrown at a Cat.

An occultation of Venus is not half so difficult as an eclipse of the sun, but because it comes seldom the world thinks it's a grand thing.

A proud man is one who waits for a vacancy in the Trinity.

Intellectual ''work'' is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.

Whiskey is for drinking; water is for fighting over.