Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.

We adore titles and heredities in our hearts and ridicule them with our mouths. This is our democratic privilege.

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.

Man is a marvelous curiosity...he thinks he is the Creator's pet...he even believes the Creator loves him; has passion for him; sits up nights to admire him; yes and watch over him and keep him out of trouble. He prays to him and thinks he listens. Isn't it a quaint idea.

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but the fly comes close.

Sometimes you gwyne to git hurt, en sometimes you gwyne to git sick; but every time you's gwyne to git well agin.

I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me.