If you've got a nice fresh corpse, fetch him out!

Of all the unchristian beverages that ever passed my lips, Turkish coffee is the worst. The cup is small, it is smeared with grounds; the coffee is black, thick, unsavory of smell, and execrable in taste. The bottom of the cup has a muddy sediment in it half an inch deep. This goes down your throat, and portions of it lodge by the way, and produce a tickling aggravation that keeps you barking and coughing for an hour.

Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate.

It is your human environment that makes climate

Intellectual ''work'' is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.

Life does not consist mainly - or even largely - of facts and happenings.

There is a great difference between feeding parties to wild beasts and stirring up their finer feelings in an inquisition. One is the system of degraded barbarians, the other of enlightened civilized people.