This doesn't happen in America! Maybe Ohio, but not in America!" Homer Simpson

Part of the fun of being alive is knowing that you're annoying the hell out of someone else.

I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I will do it again.

I like all of the early relationship strips that were collected in 'Love Is Hell,' where I pretended to be an expert in relationships and did comics like 'The Nine Types of Boyfriends,' 'Sixteen Ways to End a Relationship,' 'Twenty-Four Things Not to Say in Bed,' and other arbitrarily numbered lists.

I'm presently incarcerated. Convicted of a crime I didn't even commit. Hah! "Attempted murder"? Now honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel prize for attempted chemistry? Do they?

I think there is a certain charm to the hand drawn image that I like. My problem with CGI is that it's so rich in texture that my eyes actually get tired. Everything is in focus down to the littlest leaf.

I promise I'll do anything for you, especialy if it's easy. Homer Simpson