I promise I'll do anything for you, especialy if it's easy. Homer Simpson

Of course I’ve gone mad with power! Have you ever tried going mad without power? It’s boring and no one listens to you! — Russ Cargill

Part of the fun of being alive is knowing that you're annoying the hell out of someone else.

No matter how good you are at something, there's always about a million people better than you.

You just have to keep in mind that the important relationship is the relationship with the audience. That's what I try to do. Everything else is secondary.

I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff.

You've got to embrace the future. You can whine about it, but you've got to embrace it.