When you go to make a purchase, take a look at the product and ask yourself: 'am I being cheated?' If a product from a 'fast fashion' chain is falling apart before you've even bought it, it's not a deal. It's the fast-fashion company trying to get you to buy something that is quick on trend but slow on quality.

It must be that people who read go on more macrocosmic and microcosmic trips – biblical god trips, the Tibetan Book of the Dead, Ulysses, Finnegan’s Wake trips. Non-readers, what do they get? (They get the munchies.)

After a good night sleep, I wake up the next day, and I say, 'Come on, Tea Party, let’s get it on.'

When you go to make a purchase, take a look at the product and ask yourself: 'am I being cheated?' If a product from a 'fast fashion' chain is falling apart before you've even bought it, it's not a deal. It's the fast-fashion company trying to get you to buy something that is quick on trend but slow on quality.

The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.

The key to a nice-looking lawn is a good mower. I recommend one who is muscular and shirtless.

My favorite birthday game is Pin the Cleanup on the guests.