How is it that I'd nearly been smothered to death, and yet I could sit there and notice things like my stepbrother's abdominal muscles a few minutes later?

Life isn't a romance novel. The truth is, the reason romance novels sell so well ---- the reason why everyone loves them ---- is because no one's life is actually like that. Everyone WANTS their life to be like that.

I wonder what it's like to live in Tinaville. I get the feeling it's very shiny there.

Friend Tim shakes hands with Perfect Specimen of Mankind. Will never wash right hand again.

Weight doesn’t matter. It really doesn’t. I mean, it does if you’re a model or whatever.

I don't do alcohol. Or other people's boyfriends. And don't you forget it.

I think we make our own luck. Our parents give us life, but what we do with that life is our own responsibility.