Coleman Jacoby and Arnie Rosen won an Emmy and Mel Brooks didn't! Niezsche was right! There is no God! There is no God!

Nothing is free. You got to pay to be in society. First you start with homework.

American sex is generally straight. It happens at 11 o'clock Saturday night. In the rural areas, it happens at nine and it happens pretty fast. Got to get up the next morning, especially if there're kids. Can't make noise, either, wake the kids.

Be interested in everything. You don't have to adore it. I don't adore hip-hop, I don't think it's great music, but I'm interested, I listen. I watch a lot of new films, I see everything. I still read, I like books, whether they are old books, new books. I'm interested - you gotta stay interested!

I was out in the combat engineers. We would throw up bridges in advance of the infantry but mainly we would just throw up.

My job is to go out and entertain the most people possible.

If you stand on a soapbox and trade rhetoric with a dictator you never win.