My God, I'd love to smash into the casket of Dostoyevsky, grab that bony hand and scream at the remains, 'Well done, you god-damn genius.'

I have always been a huge admirer of my own work. I'm one of the funniest and most entertaining writers I know.

Every human being has hundreds of separate people living under his skin. The talent of a writer is his ability to give them their separate names, identities, personalities and have them relate to other characters living with him.

When I'm writing a script, I don't worry about plot as much as I do about people. I get to know the main characters - what they need, what they want, what they should do. That's what gets the story going. You can't just have action, you've got to find out what the characters want. And then they must grow, they must go somewhere.

There's not enough bad taste! I LOVE bad taste! I live for bad taste! I am the spokesman for bad taste!

I only direct in self-defense.

Judd Apatow is pretty good, both as a producer and as a director.