Now thyself is more important than “Know thyself.

The only thing we don't have a god for is premature ejaculation... but I hear that it's coming quickly.

In every spoof I make real love to the things I am spoofing.

Don’t be stupid, be a smarty / Come and join the Nazi Party!

If presidents can't do it to their wives, they do it to their country.

Comedy is lively, comedy is joy, and that's what keeps us [people] going, we've got to look forward to little, little happiness's. Little, little joys, and comedy is very, very important, it's a vital. We underestimate its value, but we should see more comedies. Comedy is life giving, it's invigorating. I really believe it.

You want to be as smart as you can about being stupid.