It's good to be the king.

The audience. They see the name Mel Brooks, they want something really funny. They don't want to be moved; they don't want to be taught any lessons. [...] I get more letters for Twelve Chairs and Life Stinks than I get from any other movies, because people actually agree with the philosophy, or were moved, or they love the movie.

You want to be as smart as you can about being stupid.

Critics can't even make music by rubbing their back legs together.

Immortality is a by-product of good work.

Now thyself is more important than “Know thyself.

If you stand on a soapbox and trade rhetoric with a dictator you never win.