The illustrators work so much harder on the books than the writers do. I mean, that's so much work doing what they do, and it's terrible for them.

So my reaction to hearing this corny-ass, horrible song ["With Arms Wide Open" by Creed] is violent, uncontrollable, sustained weeping.

I think people hate me pretty much across the board, which is nice.

I feel no obligation to teach my readers anything, to impart any sort of wisdom, to teach any sort of lesson, to instill any sort of morality. All I'm trying to do is make them and their parents laugh.

I don't really read children's books or deal with children's books, so I don't have any relationship with them other than my own.

The thing about narcissistic people is that they don't think they're being narcissistic.

I don't chase after things, but I put forward the effort and know the rest of it is out of my hands.