How can the Bible be "infallible" when from Genesis to Revelation slavery is commanded and condoned, but never condemned?

Donald Trump really is a fan of the Bible, except that it's far too long for him to read. So he just released a new, improved version, the Gospel According to Trump. It reads: "I, Donald Trump, am God. Praise, worship, and adore Me as I do Myself. Then all shall be Great, as I am Great. The End."

Trump appeals to right-wingnuts because when the going gets tough, they wig out.

Trump has officially changed his name to Ronald because he's such a clown, and in sympathy his toupée is changing its name to Bozo.

Trump appeals to the disaffected by loudly trumpet-ing what they want to hear: other people are always the problem, and the solution is to either put them in their proper place or get rid of them.

It's simply not true that Donald Trump has no experience in foreign affairs. Hell, two of his foreign affairs resulted in marriages!

Many presidents have believed in God, but Donald Trump evidently believes that he is God.