Life marks us all down, so it's just as well that we start out by overpricing ourselves.

The neurotic listens to weather reports about Small Craft Warnings, and he thinks: They're talking about me.

Women usually love what they buy, yet hate two-thirds of what is in their closets.

A parent who has never apologized to his children is a monster. If he's always apologizing, his children are monsters.

How tired God must be of guilt and loneliness, for that is all we ever bring to Him.

Most of us can easily do two things at once; what's all but impossible is to do one thing at once.

Neurotic quarrels always have the same theme-song: Hate me and get it over with.