We often pray to be better, when in truth we only want to feel better.

Healthy parakeets have the nervous energy of tennis players.

Your money, or your life. We know what to do when a burglar makes this demand of us, but not when God does.

The next voice you hear will undoubtedly be your own.

We are irritated by rascals, intolerant of fools, and prepared to love the rest. But where are they?

Humiliation is a vast country of imprecise boundaries. If you think you're there, you are. The neurotic rule: when in doubt, go ahead and feel humiliated.

Hot dogs always seem better out than at home; so do French-fried potatoes; so do your children.