The neurotic longs to touch bottom, so at least he won't have that to worry about anymore.

We are irritated by rascals, intolerant of fools, and prepared to love the rest. But where are they?

Women gather together to wear silly hats, eat dainty food, and forget how unresponsive their husbands are. Men gather to talk sports, eat heavy food, and forget how demanding their wives are. Only where children gather is there any real chance of fun.

The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next.

The hardest-learned lesson: that people have only their kind of love to give, not our kind.

Philosophy teaches a man that he can't take it with him; taxes teach him he can't leave it behind either.

What we love about love is the fever, which marriage puts to bed and cures.