Repetition is sometimes the best way to deal with the Luideag: just keep saying the same thing over and over until she gets fed up and gives you what you want. All preschoolers have an instinctive grasp of this concept, but most don’t practice it on immortal water demons. That’s probably why there are so few disembowelments in your average preschool.

If anything attacked us, we could just panic at it until it went away.

Be good. Be kind to each other. And if there's somebody you love, tell them. The world always needs more love.

I'll challenge senators and kings for the right to know the truth, but far be it from me to challenge a woman in her own kitchen.

I just find it interesting that kids apparently used to cry when Bambi's mother died. George and I both held our breaths, and then cheered when she didn't reanimate and try to eat her son.

Sometimes you need lies to stay alive.

One man's trash is another man's treasure is a third man's raw materials for their planet-buster earthquake machine.