Every picture of you is when you were younger.
I hate dreaming because when you want to sleep, you want to sleep. Dreaming is work. Next thing you know, I have to build a go-cart with my ex-landlord.
I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I was like, "Dude, you have to wait".
If my kid couldn't draw I'd make sure that my kitchen magnets didn't work.
Escalator temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience.
Sometimes I wake up and I think I should start wearing a beret, but I don't do it. One day I'm gonna, though. You bet your ass, I will have a beret on. That's ridiculous, but it's true. I always fight with wearing a beret.