I ate one anchovy, and that is why I did not eat two anchovies.

Fettucini alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults.

I went to a record store, they said they specialized in hard-to-find records. Nothing was alphabetized!

Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down.

I had to take a physical to do this show. They had a lot of weird questions like, "Have you ever tried sugar or PCP?"

I like it when people come to see me again, but you end up playing to that person only. You know there's other people out there, but you also know that the person who came to see you again is there. You're like, "I hope he's happy again."

The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.