I used to stand outside the theater knowing the truant officer was looking for me. I would stand there 'til someone came along and then ask them to buy my ticket.

Every time you think, you weaken the nation.

Shut up and say something.

I'll squeeze the cider out of your adam's apple.

Only fools are positive.

Our genius ain't appreciated around here... let's scram!

Keep laughing. As long as you’re laughing you still have hope.