Stressing the practice of living purposefully as essential to fully realized self-esteem is not equivalent to measuring an individual's worth by his or her external achievements. We admire achievements-in ourselves and others-and it is natural and appropriate for us to do so. But that is not the same thing as saying that our achievements are the measure or grounds of our self-esteem. The root of our self-esteem is not our achievements but those internally generated practices that, among other things, make it possible for us to achieve.
Nathaniel BrandenIt would be hard to name a more certain sign of poor self-esteem than the need to perceive some other group as inferior.
Nathaniel BrandenA bully hides his fears with fake bravado. That is the opposite of self-assertiveness.
Nathaniel BrandenIf you are terrified of making mistakes, you will be reluctant to acknowledge them when you do make them-and therefore you will not correct them.
Nathaniel BrandenIt is easy enough to say, Be true to your values. But what if your values are irrational? Or what if the virtues you have committed yourself to are so much against human nature that they cannot be practiced consistently? Be careful of what you accept as your code of morality. Think carefully about whether its tenets serve your life and well being. Exercise critical judgment. Realize how much is at stake-your life, your happiness, your self-esteem.
Nathaniel Branden