deep down I believe my year was a special year: it produced me.

And that was the closest I've ever come to an epiphany.

You all right, man?' This should be my name. I could be like a super hero: You All Right Man. Ah...' I stumble. Don't bug Craig,' Ronny is like. 'He's in the Craig zone. He's Craig-ing out.

I didn't want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that's really sad.

I should be a success and I'm not and other people- younger people- are. Younger people than me are on TV and getting their lives in order. I'm still a nobody. When am I going to not be a nobody?

I just want to not be me.

That's all I can do. I'll keep at it and hope it gets better.