I love the detail about the workings of the human heart and mind that only fiction can provide - film can't get in close enough.

Definitely avoid going out with ugly girls who say they want to be models. Not because they're ugly, but because they're mad".

Radio football is football reduced to its lowest common denominator. Shorn of the game's aesthetic pleasures, or the comfort of a crowd that feels the same way as you, or the sense of security that you get when you see that your defenders and goalkeeper are more or less where they should be, all that is left is naked fear.

You had to live in your own bubble. You couldn't force your way into someone else's, because then it wouldn't be a bubble any more.

Hey, great idea: if you have kids, give your partner reading vouchers next Christmas. Each voucher entitles the bearer to two hours' reading time *while the kids are awake*. It might look like a cheapskate present, but parents will appreciate that it costs more in real terms than a Lamborghini.

The artistic temperament is particularly unhelpful if it is just that, with no end product.

I couldn’t bear to think about the proper future, so I just tried to make things better for the next twenty minutes or so, over and over again.