Personally, I have a great admiration for stupidity.

Nothing annoys people so much as not receiving invitations.

Fruitcake is like semen, there's a lot of it about but no one wants to swallow it

A beggar hates his benefactor as much as he hates himself for begging.

What is termed Sin is an essential element of progress. Without it the world would stagnate, or grow old, or become colorless. By its curiosity Sin increases the experience of the race. Through its intensified assertion of individualism it saves us from monotony of type. In its rejection of the current notions about morality, it is one with the higher ethics.

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.

Everybody who is incapable of learning has taken to teaching.