I think MTV should consider using subtitles. Half the time, even I can't understand what the fu*k I'm talking about.

There's no present, there's no future, I don't even know about the past.

I got rabies shots for biting the head off a bat but that's OK - the bat had to get Ozzy shots.

The funny thing is, I was never much of a fighter. Better a live coward than a dead hero, that was my motto.

Sometimes I'm scared of being Ozzy Osbourne. But it could have been worse. I could have been Sting.

Somebody said to me this morning, 'To what do you attribute your longevity?' I don't know. I mean, I couldn't have planned my life out better. By all accounts I should be dead! The abuse I put my body through: the drugs, the alcohol, the lifestyle I've lived the last 30 years!

I'm about caring, I'm about people, and I'm about entertaining people. I'm a family man. A husband. A father. I've been a lot of other things over the years, which we don't really want to talk about.