As a result of that, and as a result of friendship, I don't think we've ever been competitive. I mean, there's probably a very good reason Hunter [S. Thompson] isn't jealous of me.

The day was warm and clear. Kids were playing soccer in the parking lots and women were sunning their babies and having their tea all over the lawns. The scene was entirely too cheery for journalism.

Political systems are run by self-selecting politicians. We don't draft people; it's not jury duty.

[T]he Clinton administration launched an attack on people in Texas because those people were religious nuts with guns. Hell, this country was founded by religious nuts with guns. Who does Bill Clinton think stepped ashore on Plymouth Rock? Peace Corps volunteers? Or maybe the people in Texas were attacked because of child abuse. But, if child abuse was the issue, why didn't Janet Reno tear-gas Woody Allen?

I arrived in the middle of a press conference - as boring a thing to sit through if you don't know the language as it is if you do.

Drugs have taught an entire generation of kids the metric system

There are just two rules of governance in a free society: Mind your own business. Keep your hands to yourself.