Lampoon was a very collegial operation, though "collegial" usually means "friendly" and it wasn't that friendly. But we were tight, like a family.

I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes.

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

Everything that's fun in life is dangerous. Horse races, for instance, are very dangerous. But attempt to design a safe horse and the result is a cow ... It is impossible to be alive and safe.

The great thing about starting golf in your forties is that you can start golf in your forties. You can start other things in your forties but generally your wife makes you stop them, as Bill Clinton found out.

In Japan people drive on the left. In China people drive on the right. In Vietnam it doesn't matter.

Any trade that is voluntarily made is mutually beneficial, by definition, and, indeed, is balanced, by definition.