We need a government, alas, because of the nature of humans.

You can't get something for nothing. Everybody remembers this except politicians.

The Republican convention, an event with the intellectual content of a Guns'n'Roses lyric attended by every ofay insurance brokerin America who owns a pair of white shoes.

West Germans are tall, pink, pert and orthodontically corrected, with hands, teeth and hair as clean as their clothes and clothes as sharp as their looks. Except for the fact that they all speak English pretty well, they're indistinguishable from Americans.

The inherent purpose of American government is let people seek their own goals and to encourage them to be responsible on the various adventures they have on their way to those goals, good, bad, and otherwise.

Whereas Rolling Stone, I just never had anything to do with them. I'd stop by the office maybe twice a year.

[Michael] Moore doesn't really use his sense of humor that much.