The only people you need in your life are the ones that prove they need you in theirs.

I don't like parties past 2 am. Then it's all losers and weirdos.

In these trying economic times, I believe the White House should have a minimalist touch: open floor plan, glass and steel, throw pillows, and an infinity pool.

[When a John McCain political campaign video that used her image] That wrinkly white-haired guy used me in his campaign ad, which means I'm running for President. So thanks for the endorsement white-haired dude, and I want America to know I'm like, totally ready to lead.

If I could read a book, I'd definitely read one of yours.

I got my eye on you boy, and when I get my eye on something, it's like search and destroy.

If I'll be a President the inaugural balls will be replaced with an inaugural Rock Band party. For expert-level players only. Don't even think about getting on drums. I play drums.