English is my second language. Laughter is my first.

I had become an atheist at the age of thirteen, when atomic bombs were dropped on Japan.

Since I was both an atheist and an absurdist, I had decided that the most absurd thing I could do would be to develop an intimate relationship with the God I didn't believe in.

Irreverence is our only sacred cow.

People don’t like to be lectured to, but if you can make them laugh, their defenses come down, and for the time being they’ve accepted whatever truth is embedded in your humor.

There is indeed a business like show business. It's the news.

Pope John Paul would be more popular if he called himself Pope John Paul George and Ringo.