If I were trying to avoid embarrassment, I wouldn't have stumbled my way through 'Dancing with the Stars.'

Poker would have never gotten on TV when we only had three networks.

So many people say, ‘You know, your taxes aren’t taken by force,’ and that’s foolish. If you don’t pay your taxes and you don’t answer the warrant and you don’t go to court, eventually someone will pull a gun. Eventually someone with a gun will show up.

I've voted Libertarian as long as I can remember, but I don't really remember much before the Clintons and the Bushes. Those clans made a lot of us bugnutty.

My parents were teetotalers and my grandparents were - it's all the way back. It's New English puritanical tradition.

I do believe that a belief in God is crazy, but that doesn't mean that the people who believe in it are crazy. Those are two different things. Ideas can be stupid and crazy, and the people who hold those ideas are not necessarily stupid and crazy.

Barack Obama is way smarter than Bush - so way, way smarter than me. Obama is way more charismatic than me.