The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds - they mature slowly.

We are nothing but a string of gut on a stick of bone riding this piece of astral soot for one piteous splinter of eternity.

The universe is like a safe to which there is a combination. But the combination is locked up in the safe.

When I see a paragraph shrinking under my eyes like a strip of bacon in a skillet, I know I'm on the right track.

It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us.

Gluttony is an emotional escape, a sign something is eating us.

... it is a fact universally acknowledged that a husband is the most ridiculous thing on earth, except for a bachelor.