Sex is a conversation carried out by another means.

Two members of my profession who are not urgently needed by my profession, Mr. Ronald Reagan and Mr. George Murphy, entered politics, and they've done extremely well. Since there has been no reciprocal tendency in the other direction, it suggests to me that our job is still more difficult than their new one.

I was irrevocably betrothed to laughter, the sound of which has always seemed to me the most civilised music in the world.

The stupidity of a stupid man is mercifully intimate and reticient, while the stupidity of an intellectual is cried from the rooftops.

Laughter... the most civilized music in the world.

In my day, there were things that were done, and things that were not done, and there was even a way of doing things that were not done.

If history teaches us one thing, than that history teaches us nothing.